I hate myself
Diddy Kong is adopted.
Kranky Kong is an ape. Kranky Kong is Donkey Kong’s dad, who is also an ape. Donkey Kong is supposedly Diddy Kong’s dad. But Diddy Kong is a fucking chimp. My best guess is that Donkey Kong is infertile and wanted a son really badly but couldnt find an ape to adopt. AND THEY DONT HAVE THE FUCKING HEART TO TELL DIDDY HE’S NOT A REAL KONG.
Im so ronery
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Reblog with your favorite word.
achow: -adaytoremember: isetmyfuckingfriendsonfire: togepenis: heroin-chick: walkthroughthefire: -ksull: defenestrate diamond nigger faggot fuck boobies Hermione. Pimplicious
You know what?
If Snape wasn’t such an obsessive freak, what happened in Harry Potter would have never happened.
You know what Ive realized?
I don’t have a girlfriend because I am too good looking. Girls don’t want to have a boyfriend more attractive than them. It all makes sense.
What I Do Everyday
Go on to Facebook. Find profiles of girls I dont know. Masturbate to their pictures. Dont feel bad about it.
Dear Call of Duty: Black Ops.
You are so sexy. What are you doing tonight? Because I want noob your tube. All night long. Love, Guy who needs a girlfriend.
She liked my status. She obviously likes my dick too.
I whip my baby’s head back and forth.